This past week was rough. I didn’t get to my fourth post like I’d planned, and I didn’t quite follow my diet.
Okay, I barely followed my diet. Like I said, last week was rough. I made a lot of changes quickly to my home and my routine, and the ever-looming return of my husband to his long, arduous work days is rearing its ugly head. All of these things spark anxiety, and it’s a wonder I managed to stay afloat without having a serious anxiety attack.
Oh, wait. I did.
Still, I survived, and it’s the beginning of a new week. Although I ate things like ice cream, burgers, cookies and brownies and I had a beer or two and a glass of wine or two, that was all last week.
I had a healthy-ish dinner last night despite the slice of cookie cake, brownie, and glass of cheap champagne. I think my dinner was yummy, although I added a bit too much ground pepper. You can find the recipe I used here on delish. I’m half Italian, and I made my own tomato sauce – although I no longer use my mother’s recipe to a T. I add in some of my own spices and ingredients now, and I’m sure my mother would approve if she got to taste it!
Although I struggled with my diet, my workouts went well. I am noticing some major changes in my upper body – my muscles are making quite the comeback! Soon, I will be back into a shape that I like, even if it does take a while for the skin to tighten up on my tummy.
The number on the scale actually started going back up, but my measurements are still the same. Although sometimes it can be discouraging, I know what’s important is the size of my body and not the actual “weight”. I’m rebuilding a lot of muscle mass – and that is more dense than fat. While I don’t necessarily like it, that means the number on the scale will go up. So I have made peace with this, and continue to watch as my waist shrinks and my muscles grow.
I also forgave myself for not following my diet well last week. No sense in carrying that guilt around!
Last week, although it dragged me down, my anxiety did not beat me. I am still strong, and I am still moving forward. Although I talked a fair amount about some of the negative things that happened, there was plenty of good! We are reorganizing our house, and getting rid of a lot of clutter – this makes my anxiety easier to manage. The less clutter I see around the house, the less the rising panic of a growing to-do list seizes me. I am more productive when I don’t spend my time worrying about how to rid my home of clutter.
I got to spend some quality time with my husband and some friends, which was awesome. And although it’s also a negative, I ate a bunch of delicious, unhealthy things. Bad for my diet, but oh-so-good for my anxiety. Indulging every now and again is a great thing! Consistency is key, and I am finding a great balance.
I think the best part of my week, though, is that my son is growing in leaps and bounds. His babbling has become more distinct, he watches us talk and attempts to move his mouth in the same ways, which is both adorable and fascinating to me. His motor skills get better each day, and I’m watching him hold onto things more firmly and grabbing things with more confidence. He smiles easily and he has gotten so close to sitting up on his own. He crawled across the floor while I was in the bathroom, but hasn’t done it again, so he’s still working on that.
All in all, I would say that last week may have been bad for my diet, and may have been rough on my anxiety, but it brought a lot of amazing steps forward for us as a family and for our son’s overall growth. Each day he astounds me with how quickly he picks up on things. He’s more and more mobile every time I turn around. Maybe I should be scared. Soon, I won’t have time to do anything but chase him around the house! Until then, I will keep updating here, and connecting with other mamas.
– Monster Mama