New and/or Interesting Experiences · Top Ten

Top 5 Best and Worst Things About New Motherhood

We are rapidly approaching the four month mark over here, and my son is growing like a weed. I want to say I’m loving every moment of it, but that would be a lie. Any mom could easily call me out on that, because there are always moments where we want to tear our hair out at the roots on any given day. So before my son starts crawling – which honestly seems like it could happen any day now, if he doesn’t skip straight to walking – I wanted to compile a list of the best and worst things about motherhood so far.

The Worst:

5. Never being able to leave the room without preparing for the worst possible scenario. 

My son has begun to roll over. This means I can’t just leave him on the bed or the couch while I run to the trashcan to throw out his dirty diapers. Or run upstairs because I forgot to grab my coffee mug from my office. Or any sort of task that requires me leaving him in the room by himself.

4. Sore arms and back. 

No matter how strong I am, how many weights I’ve lifted, I feel exhausted after holding my 16 pound son for more than five minutes. Now why is that?

3. Constant nagging. 

Sincerely, there is nothing more annoying as of late than dealing with relatives who “know best” because they’ve “been there”. Yes, I know you raised me, or my husband, or [insert other relative or friend here]. But I am raising my son, and I’d like to do that on my terms, okay?

2. Finding a babysitter.

I don’t live close to family. And even if I did, I wouldn’t want to take advantage of them. I have a friend down here where I live who also recently had a baby. My friend never says no to me if I ask her to do something. So I don’t often ask. My anxiety is so terrible that I feel guilty for asking someone else to watch my child so I can do something simple like go to a doctor’s appointment or maybe get my hair done or see a movie. I’m working on it.

1. Crying for no reason. 

My son will sometimes cry. And not the “whiny” cry, but an ear-piercing horror movie-esque shrieking. He’s been fed, changed, burped, and had a nap. I try removing clothes, or adding clothes. I try toys, I try snuggles. I try the rock’n’walk. I exhaust every option I can but sometimes he just keeps crying – so I put him down (nowhere he can roll off of now!) and walk away. My sanity is worth preserving if I’m going to keep giving him the best of me, and sometimes, they just need to cry. They’re happy until they’re not, and sometimes they don’t have a reason.

The Best:

5. Everyone tells me how cute my child is. 

As someone with anxiety, I don’t take compliments well about myself. Being out with a child, people focus mostly on him. They tell me how cute, and well behaved, and calm, etc. he is. I am more than happy to agree with them and coo over him myself.

4. Watching him grow and learn.

There is something so magical about watching him discover things for the first time. Also, nothing really matches the look on his face when he does something on his own for the first time. It is so precious and just as exciting to me as it seems to be to him.

3. His smiles.

I know it kind of ties into the last one, but there is nothing that can move my heart the way it does when my child smiles at me. Similarly, nothing tugs at my heart more than when he is upset and reaches for me. That feeling of being needed and wanted to make it all better makes me feel so humbled and loved in a way I’d never imagined.

2. Watching how he changes my husband. 

My husband is a very carefree, funny, laid-back guy. Thankfully, that hasn’t changed in fatherhood. However, my husband never really seemed comfortable around other people’s kids. Watching him with our son, I realized that he doesn’t dislike kids at all. In fact, he’s so good with our son, that I’m ashamed I ever thought he didn’t like kids. Watching them together – my two favorite people laughing and playing – warms my heart.

1. How he changed me. 

Having a baby has changed me in so many different ways. While those changes seemed to come as a balance struggle at first, my life is so full now. I have grown infinitely more patient, I’m not as quick to anger, and I like to think I laugh easier. You kind of have to, with the messes motherhood brings. But my son has eased my anxiety, as well, something I never thought was possible. He helps me to challenge myself and grow as a person in ways I thought I was stuck, like I’d hit a wall. And he challenges my anxiety and forces me to see that my worries aren’t always founded in reality. It’s absolutely amazing to me, and I am awestruck thinking about it.

How has motherhood changed you? What are your best and worst experiences? Moms with more than one child, how did that change things for you? Think about it. Feel free to share with me in the comments, I’d love to hear other people’s experiences!

– Monster Mama

 

3 thoughts on “Top 5 Best and Worst Things About New Motherhood

  1. I enjoy your posts! You sound like a very thoughtful Mama. I’m a mom of two (our boys are about the same age). Transitioning to two was interesting for me. The worst was the guilt about having to split my time and worrying about my 2 year old becoming jealous. Thankfully she wasn’t too bad. The best was I felt like my heart doubled in size. The amount of love I had for my daughter, I know had for my son as well. She also LOVES him so much and is a very attentive sister. It makes my heart happy to watch.

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    1. I will be honest, I know it’s going to be so difficult, but I cannot wait to have another child. My son filled my heart so much, I can only imagine it growing further with another. The anxieties that come with it will eat me alive, but it will be worth it!

      Thank you for he lovely compliment – believe it or not it’s not often I hear about my strengths as a mother and it’s reassuring. I’m also glad to see you like my posts. I’m happy people read them! I’m really hoping to expand to reading more of other people’s blogs as well, but I’m still finding my legs and balance as a mother, and I think it will take another few weeks to add reading and comments into my schedule. I know it’s weird, but I like stability before I add more changes, even small ones. Thank you again for your kind words, and for sharing your thoughts with me. ❤ I love hearing about other mama's feelings and experiences!

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  2. You’re welcome. It takes time for sure. I don’t think it’s weird. There is definitely a sense of comfort feeling ready to add more layers or commitments on to an already full plate. The blogging community will be there when you’re ready, Mama! I love the little community I have found here 🙂

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